Thoughts to My Wife

I use to think I couldn’t write about how you made me feel. It was something scary to open up like that. If I acknowledge being happy, if I put too much focus on my happiness, it is sure to be taken from me. After all, nothing good was ever meant to stay. But I started to write. I started to write about how you make me feel. I started to open up a side of me that I had closed for a very long time. I didn’t want to keep things inside. I wanted to share with the world all you make me feel. I didn’t think I deserved to be loved. I thought I was poison. I thought nothing good could come from being with a person like me. I doubted myself. I saw me as cold, unloving, and undeserving. I believed I was miserable and anyone associated with me would end up being miserable too. And then you happened. You showed me I was none of the things I believed. I was none of the things others made me believe about myself. You gave me patience when I needed it. Letting me warm up to the feeling of opening up as I was able. You were the first to make it known you didn’t see me as miserable, but actually as a really positive person. You were the first person who didn’t walk away when things became challenging. You have fought for me when I didn’t feel like I was worth fighting for. You’ve stood beside and have supported my dreams and my thoughts. You were the first person to help me to see my own potential and then to keep encouraging me on my way. You make me feel good inside. You make me feel happy. You make me feel wanted. You make me feel needed. Above all else, you make me feel loved. So I write. I have so much love in my heart for you, for all that you are and all that you’ll always be, and all you are becoming. So now I make it known you are everything I’ve ever needed and wanted. Thank you for being you. Thank you for loving me.

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