A thing called love

I want to be loved and cared for by the one my heart loves and needs. I always want her to stay. I want to be enough. I want to make her happy. I want to be all she needs me to be. I fail. I’m human and I fail. I try. God knows I try. But it isn’t always enough, can’t be enough. A love like this is new because I’ve never felt it so deep. I try to learn. To watch and pay attention. I try to grow and be the best me I can be. I don’t want to lose what I have. I don’t want to lose her because I’m not enough. I don’t want to lose her because of illness. I don’t want to lose her because others keep trying to get in the way. I can’t lose her. She has become my everything in every way. I beg God to hear the prayers I cry and to help. He doesn’t always hear and doesn’t always respond. But she’s still here. She’s still alive when so many have tried to kill her. So He does hear some of my prayers. For now, I just keep trying, keep staying, and loving with everything in me.

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